There are seasons in business and in life when the work in front of us is loud and visible.
- Launching.
- Posting.
- Selling.
- Speaking.
- Showing up.
And then there are seasons when the real work is quieter.
Less Instagrammable.
More internal.
The kind of work where you’re sitting with your own story long enough to realize that some of the ways you’ve been moving through the world were never actually about ambition or productivity.
They were about protection.
This week on The Found Podcast with Molly Knuth, I had the chance to sit down with Erin McGuire-Henson, previous guest and author of The Art of Unraveling, and our conversation felt like one of those deep exhale moments.
The kind where you realize you’re not the only one who has spent years trying to hold it all together while quietly coming undone inside.
We All Carry Something
One of the most grounding parts of my conversation with Erin was her perspective on trauma.
Not in a dramatic, clinical, heavy way.
But in a deeply human way.
Her belief is simple:
Every single one of us carries experiences that have shaped how safe we feel in the world.
Some of those experiences are obvious.
Others are subtle.
Cumulative.
Sneaky.
Seasons of uncertainty.
Moments of rejection.
Collective experiences like living through a global pandemic.
Years of pressure to perform or prove.
Over time, our nervous systems do exactly what they’re designed to do, they build strategies to help us survive.
We become high-achieving.
Hyper-independent.
People-pleasing.
Perfecting.
Sound familiar??
From the outside, it can look like success.
On the inside, it can feel like constant vigilance.
Erin’s work and her book gently invites us to notice those patterns without shame.
To recognize that they were once necessary.
And to begin asking whether they still are.
When Healing Becomes Another To-Do List
If you’ve spent any time in personal growth spaces lately, you’ve probably heard phrases like:
“Regulate your nervous system.”
“Calm your vagus nerve.”
“Just breathe.”
And while those tools absolutely have value, Erin shared something that stopped me in my tracks.
Sometimes we use regulation as a way to avoid feeling.
We rush to fix sadness.
We try to optimize grief.
We treat discomfort like a productivity problem.
But real healing, the kind that actually changes how we live and lead, requires making space for the full emotional experience.
Not just the tidy, inspirational parts.
Fifteen Years of Writing… and Hiding
Another part of Erin’s story that felt deeply relatable was her journey to publishing The Art of Unraveling.
She spent nearly 15 years writing, rewriting, editing, and refining the manuscript.
And yes, it was a labor of love.
But she also realized something many of us eventually have to face:
Staying in the process allowed her to stay safe.
She could say, “I’m writing a book.”
She could look like she was moving forward.
She could keep perfecting.
Without actually stepping into the vulnerability of being fully seen.
Whew.
If you’ve ever redesigned your website for the fourth time…
Held back from launching because it’s “not quite ready”…
Or stayed busy enough to avoid the bigger, scarier next step…
You probably understand this kind of protection.
Preparation can be powerful.
But sometimes it also becomes a shield.
And at some point, the work asks us to release it anyway.
Unraveling Isn’t Failure — It’s Leadership
What I appreciated most about Erin’s message is that unraveling isn’t framed as breakdown.
It’s framed as return.
Return to truth.
Return to alignment.
Return to the version of yourself that existed before survival strategies took the wheel.
For founders, this matters more than we often admit.
Because the way we lead others is always influenced by the way we’ve learned to lead ourselves.
When we begin to understand our internal patterns (the urgency, the perfectionism, the fear of visibility, the drive to prove) we gain the opportunity to choose differently.
To build businesses from grounded intention instead of old wounds.
To create impact from wholeness rather than exhaustion.
That kind of leadership changes families.
Teams.
Communities.
A Gentle Reflection
If this conversation stirred something in you, you might sit with these questions:
- Where might I be staying busy instead of being brave?
- What emotions have I been trying to “fix” rather than feel?
- What protective patterns once helped me succeed… but may now be limiting me?
- What would it look like to trust that unraveling could actually be growth?
You don’t have to answer all of that today.
You don’t have to overhaul your life.
Sometimes awareness itself is the first courageous step.
Listen to the Full Conversation
You can hear my full conversation with Erin McGuire-Henson and learn more about her new book The Art of Unraveling on this week’s episode of The Found Podcast.
It’s a thoughtful, compassionate reminder that the work we do within ourselves is never separate from the work we do in the world.
And that sometimes the bravest thing a founder can do…is finally allow herself to soften.
Resources & Links
- Erin’ McGuire-Henson ‘swebsite: PureLightWellness.com
- The Art of Unraveling book
- Companion workbook + healing resources
- Upcoming group programs
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