I have a confession: I’m kind of a bad friend.

Not because I don’t love my people, but because when my ambition kicks in — when I’m chasing goals or knee-deep in projects — friendship is usually the first thing to slide off my calendar. Sometimes it feels easier to prioritize work, family, or even rest, over grabbing coffee with a friend.

But here’s the thing: friendship isn’t optional. Friendship is survival.

Why Friendship Matters

Research shows that 61% of adults say close friendships are more important for fulfillment than marriage, kids, or money. Friendships literally buffer stress — especially for women, who are wired to “tend-and-befriend” during difficult seasons. That oxytocin release actually heals stress in our bodies. And as we age, friendships become one of the strongest predictors of long-term health and happiness.

This isn’t just about having brunch buddies. It’s about health, joy, and resilience.

My Struggle with Friendship Guilt

I’ve been in seasons where I poured so much into my work and my family that I had nothing left for friends. I skipped coffee dates, left texts unanswered, and told myself “they’ll understand.” And they usually did. But I also missed out on the kind of connection that restores me — the kind that makes me a better mom, partner, and leader.

Barriers to Friendship

Let’s be honest — friendships look different in different seasons. Distance, busyness, and guilt often get in the way. But friendships don’t have to be perfect to matter. They just need to be tended.

How Ambitious Women Can Prioritize Friendship

Here are a few practices that help:

1. Micro-gestures matter — a text or voice memo goes a long way.
2. Schedule it like work — put it on the calendar.
3. Combine life + friendship — walk together, run errands, bring the kids.
4. Group spaces — book clubs, group chats, dinners keep connection alive.
5. Give grace — show up when you can, let go of guilt when you can’t.

The Invitation

As we head into this next season, I’m challenging myself — and inviting you — to recommit to friendship. Who is one friend you could text today? Who could you invite for coffee this week?

Because here’s the truth: we’re better when we’re not doing this alone.

Work is important. Family is important. Rest is important. But friendships are equally important — and maybe it’s time we started living like it.